THE WILL
Today I received notice of my dad’s will. He died earlier this year on January 7.
We were estranged, for over a decade. Not expecting anything.
I mentioned in an earlier post that he died of natural causes. He knew his time was coming, and had time to reach out to me, to say a final goodbye, but chose not to.
I was told to expect the will to be sent; as one of his children, it’s legally required.
Here’s what it said:
He amended his will in January 2025. At that point his daughter – my older sister – had already died. But I was still alive and well. But according to my dad, I was also dead, as he considered I was to have “predeceased” him.
I was told the content was all just legal jargon; standard practice, and not to read much into it.
However, his statement that he was “specifically disinheriting” me, was a conscious choice.
He knew I was alive, gay and living in Mexico. I wanted nothing from him, but I’ll never know why he chose to formally write me off.
I could ask my brother. He got everything. Whatever it is.
Just his sad, final act, with no regard for me. As it has always been.
This is brutal in a very specific way. Not an inheritance issue, but a final administrative act of erasure. Calling it “just legal jargon” misses the point completely. He made a choice to put rejection in writing. That says everything about him and nothing about your worth.
I don’t know if it is a specific type of legalese written language, but last week I read the exact same verbiage in the will of my partners’ mother, relative to one of her children. The son was not estranged, nor were his children and she provided no explanation. I’m
Just the Executor, but just reading it hurt my heart. I simply can’t imagine how you feel….gratuitous cruelty. Men may be able to produce children but it surely doesn’t make them a dad.
You deserved better and your children deserved better.
Wishing you the best